26.11.2016

5 Great Uses For Your Old Samsung Note 7

So you love G-Dragon and probably K-Pop. You think "Wow! These guys are cool and I want to learn Korean now and buy cool stuff from there because it's better and cute than what I have here."

Thus, you start with some cosmetics or merchandise. Later on you think that your iPhone is pretty much out of date and you should get something new, perhaps a Samsung phone. Perhaps even a Samsung Note 7.

Suddenly you hear all those media outlets talk about how the Note 7 explodes and how you should not use it anymore. "Damn!" you think, "only last week did my hoverboard explode and now this?!"
Well do not worry, we've got the 5 best uses for you old Note 7 right here for you.


1.) Use it for your next BBQ session.

 You might know this situation - You plan a great BBQ with your family, friends & fans. You marinate the chicken, get the sausages and salads read for the action, you pack the coal and the grill and everything is fine and dandy until...
Oops.
...you find out that you forgot/emptied/swallowed your lighter and cannot make fire. You also decide that it's not cool to pull a Tom Hanks in Castaway since all your family, friends & fans are there and it's 2016, so what to do?
You remember the ~$900 Note 7 in your pocket. You are absolutely grateful for having it with you, since it lightens the bonfire with a single explosion. Thank, Samsung, you saved my BBQ! <3

Yay!

2.) You are in a car chase.

It happens all the time: You rob a bank or are totally wasted and those pesky policemen try to make you stop. You just want to go home and drop into your bed - something we can all sympathize with.
So how to make those problematic people go away?
The least of us might make use of their in-built machine guns or other contraptions to make not only such nasties but also traffic jams go away with ease.

I'll clear us a way out, baby.
What do us normal folks do in such a situation though?

The answer is clear as day! Just use your Note 7 to get rid of the pursuers. One well timed throw should be enough to steer clear of any problems that might be on your tail.

Leave me alone, coppers!
Problem solved.

3.) Unclog your toilet.

You just watched G-Dragon perform That XX and you clogged the toilet with all the tear-soaked hankies. No shame in that. We all did that if we weren't dead inside already and had no tears left to shed.

You know how hard it is to find a clean-looking, clogged toilet on google images?!
What a mess to clean this up the old-fashioned way! Rubber-gloves, plungers, dirt everywhere..
Luckily, you own a Note 7! Just insert the phone into the toilet and let it do its magic.

No more mess, just smoke and fire.
Problem solved!

4.) A great present to people you dislike.

It's Christmas-time and everyone in the office is exchanging gifts and presents. You like your co-workers - that is, most of them. Everyone but Mike.. There is always a Mike.

Stupid stock-photo Mike with his stupid stock-photo shirt! Damn you, Mike!
Now, you could be really thoughtful and send him a pack of poop in Christmas-y wrap. There are actually companies that do this. Side note: Please don't send us poop. Thank you.

Then again, you still have this Note 7 you cannot use otherwise. "Hey, Mike still uses his stupid old iPhone with the stupid comfortable iOS, I bet he'd die for a new phone... Hehe."

Enjoy your present, magically shapeshifting, stupid stock-photo Mike. [insert diabolical laughter]
This'll be a bomb at the next Christmas-party.

5.) As a fun Turkey-stuffing on Thanksgiving.

It's always the same old, same old Thanksgiving-dinner. Always the same stuffing, the same taste. How boring!

Mmh, delicious classic.
This time, you decide to spice things up and give the Turkey a little South Korea-style stuffing. Especially, since you decided to invite stock-photo Mike in order to make things up after the Christmas fiasco. Stupid Mike.
What will you stuff the Turkey with? Kimchi and laxatives?
Why not put a Note 7 in it for some exciting surprise? It also bakes the bird from the inside and makes it crisp and spicy, not tender and juicy like the boring variant.

Just imagine some majestic flames bursting out of the Turkey this time.

So there you have it, 5 exciting uses for your old Samsung Note 7. If you enjoyed this post and would like to see more like this one in the future, make sure to leave a comment below. :)

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